It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
This is the high leading the old right now
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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