Umm I'm too high to move.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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