this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
