Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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