Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
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After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I AM VODKA MAN
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
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This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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