they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
