Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
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