Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Ladies don't puke and tell
Randomize