i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
