i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Randomize