That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
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