idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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