i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
he thought i was a dude.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Randomize
