ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
he's gonorrhea incarnate
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
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