Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
