Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
