when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Randomize