i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Randomize
