giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Watching her eat just hurts me
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
