Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
