Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
