I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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