I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Randomize
