The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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