I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
