Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize