I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
His nipple licking is glorious
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