My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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