apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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