You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
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He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
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Also, beer. Big fan.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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