How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
