we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Randomize
