this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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