Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize