Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize