even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
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