i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
there is puke in my bra ... again
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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