girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Randomize
