Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
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