My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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