well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
