He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
