Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
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