If you die in college, do you die in real life?
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
