I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Pants 0. Shit 1.
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
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