I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
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