Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
