I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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