KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Let's paint friendship bongs
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
