wakey wakey hands off snakey
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
