Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
